So I turned Five on the 15th. It's hard to believe. Growing up can be kinda cool. I'm not actually 5, I'm 41. But as of January 15th, 2006 - I have 5 years clean. That's right, 'been showering for 5 years. Not really. Well.. yeah really, but that's not what it means. Those of you who know what it means, know. Those of you who don't know, just be glad I am. Trust me, your lives are alot better because of it.

I used to destroy everyone and everything around me. Sucked them into my void and turned everything upsidedown. Things have changed. That's a good thing. I try to help now. I try to make things better now. I try...

Trouble is, when you grow up, there are so many things/people that need help. So many situations that could be made better. If only.....

You see, I can only do the next right thing. I don't have control over you, your situation, the weather, time. If you need me, I'll be there. If there is something I can do, I have the courage to do it. If there's nothing I can do, I can accept that. Can you?

When I need help, I've learned to ask. I'm not afraid of asking any more. I used to be. I used to think that it meant I was weak if I couldn't do it by myself. I learned that, with the help of others, others who have been there-done that-and come out the other side, I too can accomplish much. But it's up to me to ask.

Life is good today. As it was yesterday. We'll see about tomorrow. Ain't gonna worry about it though. I'll deal with it when it comes. For now, I'll just sit here and count my blessings. Blessings like having having friends willing to answer my questions. Willing to show me the way. And the blessing of being able to be there if someone else needs help. Able to show them the way.
If you need me, I'll be here, Just ask.
Till Then....